Paris je t'aime

1. Don't hate me for being negligent. I couldn't bear losing a follower.
2. The adventures (and travel disasters continue)...
3. Im typing on a European Keyboard, so sometimes my Ys and Zy get mixed up...

So off to Paris it was for Valentine's day and a friend's birthday. In keeping with my new found habit of sharing my travel disasters with you (in hopes that you do not make the same mistakes) the lesson learned from this one is to never ever ever use easy jet. They do everything possible to make you think you are saving money when really they steal everything you have... everything. We got to the airport 40 minutes before our £59 flight, but were never told of easy jet's (apparently) strictly enforced policy of closing check-in 40 minutes before all flights. All she said to us was, "its our policy" over and over again. She didn't even have a name-badge or care the one of our travelers was terribly ill with consumption, had a death in the family, was allergic to the incense the cabdriver used, and thus required us to change drivers three times. Despite the rudeness and lack of compassion of the no-name easy jet attendant, we were determined to get to Paris, so we took a train to London thinking there would be hourly trains from London to Paris. No such thing. Had to stay the night and get on the 5:25 chunnel in the morning. We finally arrived at 9:15 am, almost twelve hours after our initial arrival time and £300 poorer. Despite the hell we endured to get there... Paris was completely worth it. I fell in love.

The Louvre is gargantuan. I was warned, but it was grander than I even remembered. I decided that since there was such limited time and I didn't have the recommended 9 months it takes to see every single piece (3 million) in the collection, I would stick to the highlights. The Da Vincis, Raphaels, Michelangelos, Renoirs, Degas, Monets, Cézannes, Parthanon Marbles, Napoleon Apartments, Coronation jewels... the most memorable work wasn't a masterpiece, but a recently installed work by contemporary artist Anselm Kiefer. I have always followed his work and recognize it instantly, but this was such a diversion from what I knew. The huge size is common in his work (30 feet high and 15 feet wide), but this was a much darker palatte and subject. At the base of the painting lies a naked man who seems dead but is merely "in the universe." Kiefer used all the components of alchemy to create the grand universe that engulfs the living man... referencing the immortality promised by alchemy itself. The monumental self-portrait painting is installed in a staircase and flanked by two additional sculptures. On one side in a tiny niche is a mound planted with a dozen atrophied aluminum sunflowers. On the other is a giant blackened depetaled sunflower growing from a pile of lead books. The first contemporary installation in the Louvre's History since Georges Braque painted the ceiling of Henri II’s antechamber in 1953. It was truly stunning.

Then off to Versailles. We stayed for almost 6 hours. It isn't the enormity or grandiosity of the estate that overwhelmed me. It was Marie Antoinette's private apartments and hamlet that took my breath away. She created an entire village, miles off from the Chateau, where goats, sheep, cows, donkies, and chickens roamed about freely... it was the ideal set for Snow White; The Sequel. The buildings resembled huts like the home of Shrek... with winding wooden staircases and lower the average door frames. It was magical. We stayed on her grounds all afternoon.

So charmed by the queen, we bought Sofia Coppola's film and watched it at home while eating baguette and nutella. The entire movie was filmed on site and we screamed everytime a room was shot that we had just walked through. All the desserts in the movie were made by the famous bakery LaDoree, where we had gone for tea the previous evening.

The last day we went to Musee l'Orangerie, the museum dedicated to Monet's waterlillies. 360 degrees of Monet. It was a dream.

Paris was magnificent. I was supposed to leave last Sunday, but didn't leave till yesterday evening.

A Pub Crawl in London

Having not been entirely defeated by my airport experience in London last weekend, I decided to have another go. Lesson learned, I opted for the 5 hour train ride this time (just in case it snowed again). Amidst the site and museum packed three days, the most memorable site-seeing was a very ambitious Pub Crawl. According to Frommer and his infamous guidebooks this was "The World's Greatest Pub Crawl," including 27 stops in all the boroughs of London Town. We made it to about 5.
We started off at "Wilson's Pub" to watch the Ireland v. Wales Rugby match on Kinnerton Street in Knightsbridge. After having a double Whiskey on the rocks it was off to "The Nag's Head," a truly antique and quaint pub, adorned with old skies and skates hanging from the rafters. There was a huddle of men standing about us all wearing maroon and navy striped ties. Having had two whiskey drinks at this point, we decided it was a good idea to inquire about the matching cravates. It just so happened that they were the queens guardsmen! Amazing. After we recovered from the tie-wearing heroes, we were off to "Grenadier," also known as the hardest pub to find in the world. It was on Wilton's Row, off of Wilton's Crescent, off of Wilton's Place, etc. It was tucked in a wooded area on a dead-end street and was almost entirely concealed by vines draped across its facade. We cheersed our third stop with ales and ciders and then made our way over the Hyde Park Corner tube stop to head to Piccaddilly where more adventures awaited. We traversed Piccaddilly to find the "Red Lion" only to discover it was closed. It claimed to be good ol' Dickens' hangout spot. Our spirits still high we headed over to "Dog & Duck" where we found an arrow pointing upstairs labeled "Ladies" and an arrow pointing downstairs labeled "Gents." The concept of a segregated pub wasn't too appealing, so off we went for 10pm Chinese Food on Gerrard Street. Never have I needed greasy chinese food more. It was delectable.
Despite having made it to only 1/5th of the World's Greatest Pub Crawl, the ones we did find were magnificent and allowed for an amazing overview of the different areas of London. It is one of the best ways to experience a city... even though it gets more and more challening to follow the map as the drinking continues...

Amanda

Hotel Airport

I went to London this weekend... which indicates ( http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/02/02/europe.snow/ ) that I was stuck in said wonderful City of London in the worst snow the UK has seen in 18 years. I have decided to make this post a survival guide to all those who may one day find themselves stranded in an airport for 2 1/2 days.
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Stoffel Itinerary for Hotel London Heathrow Airport:

Guest: Stoffel, Amanda
Check in time: 5pm, Sunday, 1st of February
Expected Check out Time: 7:20pm, Sunday, 1st of February
Actual Check out Time: 7:00am, Tuesday, 3rd of February

Food/Nourishment: Take advantage of all free food and water. When they start passing out water-bottles and bags of chips you should know that they don't expect you to leave for a long time. Stash the water-bottles and don't let anyone steal them from you. Airports are prepared for epidemics and thus have a huge water supply, which means every man for himself. Additionally, buy as much as you can before the stores close around 8. If they offer beer or any alcoholic beverage, buy it.

Company: Make friends! They make the long nights shorter, provide heat on the cold granite floors, and serve as wonderful companions with whom to commiserate. Don't let cultural differences or language barriers get in the way. Everyone in there understands how miserable you are. There are people there who might be professional campers or mountain climbers and could recommend survival techniques. Or they could be Tom Hanks in disguise, who has experience from the movie Terminal. Make friends with the girls who over packed, as that huge extra suitcase most likely has a pillow and a warm blanket.

Sleep/Bed: This is a tricky one. Around 7pm when the airlines starts handing out blankets, the static kind, this, like the water bottles, indicates you will be here overnight and should grab as many as you can. Possible sleeping methods:
Stranded Victim A: Laid out all his luggage, draped a blanket over the luggage, and then slept face downwards. Should resemble a lumpy mattress.
Stranded Victim B: Placed luggage on rolley-cart, sat in a chair, and placed feet on the rolley foot rest. Should resemble a stiff reclining chair.
Stranded Victim C: Wrapped self in blanket and then wiggled under a row of chairs to create darkness in the stark airport lighting. Should resemble a cocoon.
Stranded Victim D: Unpacked all luggage and laid clothes out to create a kind of mattress pad. Used sweaters under head and lower back. Should resemble a homeless man.
Stranded Victim E: Bought romance novels. Should resemble a Jodi Picault book.
RULES FOR ALL AIRPORT SLEEPERS: Whatever method you chose, use whatever bag you have all your travel documents and money in as your headrest. If you wrap it in a blanket or sweater, it makes a fantastic and safe pillow.

Save Your Electronics: Since there are no outlets in airports (I think thats a terrorism control thing), forget charging your phone, laptop, or ipod. Which means use them sparingly. If not in use, turn the power off all together. Save it for the 8 hours flight you are going to have later on (in the week).

I hope you have enjoyed your stay here at Hotel Airport. We look forward to seeing you again sometime and please grab some complimentary chocolate as a token of our gratitude.